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FORREST GUMP GOES TO HEAVEN

The day finally arrived: Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. St. Peter says, "Well, Forrest, itīs certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must inform you that the place is filling up fast, and weīve been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test is short and you have to pass it before you can get into heaven. 1) What days of the week begin with the letter T? 2) How many seconds are there in a year? 3) What is Godīs first name?" Forrest says, "Well, the first one -- how many days in the week begin with the letter "T"? That oneīs easy. Thatīd be today and tomorrow." The Saintīs eyes open wide and he exclaims, "Forrest, thatīs not what I was thinking, but ..... Iīll give you credit for that answer. "How about the second one?" asks St. Peter. "How many seconds in a year?" "Now that oneīs harder," says Forrest, "but I thunk and thunk and guess the only answer can be twelve." Astounded, St. Peter says, "Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how in Heavenīs name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?" "Shucks, thereīs gotta be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd." "Hold it," interrupts St. Peter. "I see where youīre going with this, and Iīll have to give you credit for that one, too.Letīs go on with the next and final question. Can you tell me Godīs first name?" "Sure" Forrest replied, "its Andy." "Andy?!" exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St. Peter. "Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name of Andy as the first name of God?" "That was the easiest one of all," Forrest replied. "ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN." St. Peter opens the Pearly Gates and said: "Run, Forrest, run."

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